Not In My Vocabulary

There has to be a word for
Making me feel worthless
There has to be a word for this
Pushing me into my own darkness
Rather than be the guiding light
You promised to help me see right
But I guess I did something wrong
For you to see me differently

There has to be a word for
Turning my name into a cuss
There has to be a word for this
A word for my crippling self-esteem
As I agree with the pour of your words
There has to be a word for
This blame game that I’m playing alone
There has to be a word for this
Because I cannot find it

There has to be a word
When they ask about the damage
When they ask why I never left
Why it took me so long
There has to be a better word
Rather than love or pretend
There has to be a word for this
Because I can’t say it

 

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